such a homely word
I know I know. I need to make the effort. I could shut myself off easily and never be heard from again. Really. But then again I’d miss connection. I would miss the simple and greatest pleasure of being with another person, how terribly sad is that?
Recently I have been making an effort. Reconnecting, making new friends; I can do this. More importantly, I want to. Every once in awhile a dear friend of mine who really knows me will call me up and say, “Deidre, it time’s to step out of the closet.” And I usually reply, “Have I been there that long?” It’s what I do. Like biting my nails. It’s a ritual or habit I created long ago only the point no longer exists. I wish I had an explanation, but there is none. Pathetic.
Somewhere between reclusivity and bacchanalia there is a lovely balance of work and play. In order to find it I need to step out of my closet. My intention to say “yes” more often than I say “no.” Just for a little while; see where it leads. If nothing else there’s got to be a better view.